Welcome to Missouri, where the barbecue is legendary, the weather is unpredictable, and the phrase “Show Me” applies to just about everything.
Before you pack your bags and settle into the heart of the Midwest, let’s go over a few truths that might have you questioning your move to the “Show Me State.”
The Weather is Bipolar
If you like predictable weather, Missouri is not for you. One minute it’s sunny and warm, and the next it’s a full-on thunderstorm. In winter, you might be sunbathing on Monday and shoveling snow on Wednesday. Get used to checking the weather app constantly—it’s a wild ride.
Barbecue Will Become Your New Religion
Kansas City, St. Louis—doesn’t matter where you live, barbecue is king here. Ribs, burnt ends, brisket, and all the fixin’s will take over your life. If you even hint that another state does BBQ better, be prepared for some seriously heated debates—and possibly an exile from the local cookout.
You’ll Need to Choose Between Cardinals and Royals
Missouri is a baseball state, and you’ll have to pick a side. St. Louis Cardinals fans are everywhere, but Kansas City Royals fans are just as diehard. There’s no neutral ground, so choose wisely—and get ready for trash talk if you pick the “wrong” team.
It’s Called “Missour-uh,” Not “Missour-ee”
One of the first things you’ll learn is that no one in Missouri can agree on how to pronounce the state’s name. Is it “Missour-ee” or “Missour-uh”? Depending on where you are, you’ll hear both, and you’ll be judged for whichever one you choose.
The Bugs are Unreasonably Large
Summers in Missouri mean two things: humidity and bugs. The mosquitoes here could practically carry you away, and cicadas will keep you up at night with their obnoxious hum. And don’t even get me started on the spiders—they’ve been training for battle.
The State is Divided—Literally
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Missouri’s got a split personality. St. Louis and Kansas City might as well be in different states, with totally different vibes. You’ve got your diehard city folks on one side and small-town pride on the other. Don’t assume that everyone here gets along just because they live in the same state.
Show-Me Skepticism is Real
Missourians are skeptical by nature, thanks to the state’s “Show Me” motto. If you claim something’s the best, you better be ready to prove it. People won’t take your word for anything—show them, or they won’t believe you.
Tornado Season is a Roller Coaster
If you’re not familiar with tornado drills, you will be. When spring and summer roll around, tornado sirens become a regular part of life. You’ll learn to take cover in the basement or bathroom while silently hoping you don’t end up on the evening news.
You’ll Have a Love-Hate Relationship with the Ozarks
The Lake of the Ozarks is both a beloved vacation spot and a tourist trap. On one hand, it’s a stunning natural escape; on the other, it’s crawling with speedboats, pontoon parties, and rowdy lake-goers. Prepare for conflicting feelings every time summer rolls around.
The Arch is Cool, But That’s About It
Yes, St. Louis has the Gateway Arch, and yes, it’s impressive… the first time. After you’ve visited, it becomes just another backdrop in your life. You’ll eventually get tired of people asking if you’ve been up it yet—trust me, you only need to do it once.
So, are you ready for life in Missouri? Between the unpredictable weather, tornado drills, and fierce BBQ rivalries, you’re in for an adventure. But if you can handle the quirks, you’ll be rewarded with Midwestern charm, plenty of baseball, and some of the best barbecue you’ll ever taste—just don’t forget your bug spray.