Imagine that the EPA, the same federal authorities that will punish you for anything as trivial as sneezing next to a puddle in Iowa, has been found to have hazardous water in its own premises. Indeed, the organization tasked with rescuing the earth is unable to provide safe drinking water at its deserted offices. This is something you really can’t make up.
And who is pointing the finger at them? Iowa Senator Joni Ernst essentially instructed the EPA to, quote, “Get the lead out.”
A Plot Twist in Governmental Irony
It seems that the pandemic forced the majority of federal employees to work from home, leaving many government facilities all but empty. When water pipes aren’t used for four years, do you know what happens? They become breeding grounds for bacteria that could challenge even the most resilient immune systems, as well as for lead and copper.
Even worse, this isn’t limited to storage closets and sporadic cubicles. Child care facilities are located in a few of these structures. Yes, children. Government daycares are exposing toddlers to tap water tainted with lead while the EPA is preoccupied controlling water in isolated agricultural ditches.
That’s okay; layoffs and the government selling and terminating leases on all of the vacant offices that America is paying for in Washington, D.C., will soon resolve the issue.
How Did It Get This Bad?
These structures’ water didn’t suddenly turn dangerous. Toxic water has been a problem for years, according to Ernst. However, this problem is only now gaining attention due to stories of teleworking abuses and federal buildings being used at less than 25% of their capacity.
Blame government bureaucracy as well as the water for the stagnation. Water use and the quality of the water passing through the pipes both drastically decreased when people stopped visiting the office. However, the EPA managed to remain blissfully ignorant of the dangerous conditions in its own neighborhood rather than confronting this issue head-on.
A Bureaucratic Bungling Bonanza
This is when things get crazy. Ernst has been ranting about a larger trend of federal government mismanagement, which includes the EPA’s seeming negligence. The inefficiencies continue to mount, from telework abuses to government employees receiving locality pay bonuses even after relocating to less expensive places.
The icing on the cake: a whistleblower recently disclosed that a federal employee was arrested for driving while intoxicated while on the clock and was still compensated. It would be too ridiculous to binge-watch if this were a Netflix drama.
What s Next for the EPA?
To be honest, Senator Ernst deserves the answers she is requesting from EPA Administrator Michael Regan. Since the EPA is unable to control their own water, how can they legitimately regulate anyone else’s?
If not, Donald Trump might have different plans for the EPA, including its excessive expenditures, poisonous water, and wasteful practices.
The next time you hear a lecture about safeguarding a wetland or conserving water, keep in mind that the EPA’s own taps may be releasing more poisons than they are preventing. Even the watchdogs in America require a watchdog.
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